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Old  too new and 33
: 08-11-2009, 10:17 PM
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too new

this one's about meeting a woman...simply put..you have to recollect from your personal experience...what led to this point and what comes after...etc...its situational...on the timeline...it could have append mite ave append could happen...etc....etc....for those who continue to read my poetry always thank you and for those who don't get it lol...ask a question get to know the author trust me it makes mroe sense that way be safe...

she was sexier than two blue moons
sky shown dayliht ...too new too soon...
raising her head she moved my doom and gloom
there was a time i couldn't write this...
because the wounds were too new too soon
who knew i could croon...make sense? nah but it will by noon
quater past nine the day before
passed her a glass of wine...she finished and said...some more
by ten then when i asked her more of?
and she said more so that i know that your eyes havent left my face
or the space covered by lace
or the way my legs brace...wine's still on my lips do you like my tastes?
1033 hold my waste...i moved forward she moves back askin me whats my haste?
i said it was just your tastes...i was only holding you just in case
hwo thoughtful...the smirk that crossed her face
said...well in that case...let me sit...in a way you can see my face
coming forward like she wanted to take my space
11 now are you followng...then you'll know my state
don get up...and she sat...said...just wait
puts my hand in a place like buns on a plate
squeeze...yes that feels great...simple she whispers
thats all it takes...dress was black was now down to her waste
half past the hour...i smiled and asked whats your haste
i like your taste...lips natural no paste
dinner was nice but the hunger inside...said she couldn't wait
12 she stood up and said hold on...im not completely sold on
clothes on...so off they went...she said help me back on...do be a gent
she didnt want shelter so gone was my tent
and ensuing was the emotions i could feel her vent
top of the our came and went
let me rest...she said but i had another intent
movements were freer...she said she was spent
one more time...she said one last thing...
but she remained illusive it made no dent
morning came and went...half past noon
she showered panites first...she was sexier than two blue moons
curves...smile...i avoided because they were too new too soon
then there was the short black dress the heals the bag...
she was in a rush but then she turned and smiled...tommorow she said
so stay tuned...

33

pushing 30 maybe 33
significance of the ages...escapes me
until i turned 33 became 37
that was the calendar year 2011
now its back to the present and im looking to the future
what does it hold whos gonna shoot ya
stonins done...now they live and dive by the gun
modern day crucifiction
often said im not jesus christ...because i wasn't that nice
sitting at your wedding killed the doves and still threw rice
fed the hungry...gues it doesn't sound as nice
or vile dependin on your style...
i get it...im close to failing...watch my voice trail....
....ing off...so soft...no comfort...never had it but i heard that sherbert
was the best
don worry read it all it'll make sense...my case i rest
her skirt and dress...told her was a mess met her at the well
swell
throw the first stone if you aren't goin to hell
well
nobody could shoot better than william tell...put him in so many rhymes
gues he can read my mind but he wont tell so all is welll
arrongance they call it...im so swell....ah well
back to the poetry tellin me im fulla myself...
if you understood so far the parrallels aren't myself...
i look in the mirror and ask why self
when you could be somebody else...
gave up every right i had
education
wasn't from the books off the shelf...
wasn't written by the scribes or the pharisees
look far enough into the past the future isn't hard to see
well
not hard for me...only thing is christlike
its hard to be...hard for me
because the only thing i see is consequence no security...
guess im a cynic with good intentions planning for when i reach 33


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Shana B is offline
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post #2  
08-11-2009, 10:49 PM
Dhaz Lone Ranger
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I love the first one... reading it i was filled with anticipation...it kept building and building and now i want to kno what happens next... im at a loss for the last one
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08-12-2009, 01:50 PM
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the first one simply stated was just sexy as hell...and it shows that sensuality isnt about being explicit but about drawing on that energy that feeling that comes from a vision and expressing it in simple detail...its ironic that both characters at some point used the word haste...when the poem itself read at a deliberately slow pace which in itself adds to its sensuality...or maybe that just how i read it.....but as shana said it leaves u wanting to read more...so u know what u need to do..lol..

as far as the 33....the minute i saw the number i smiled...not because of the poem itself since i hadnt even read a line..but for what the number meant to me....a very powerful number if u grew up with a christian background even for the non practicing..lol...i always saw it in the context of an end and a beginning...death and rebirth..like the phoenix...but anyway..lol..the pace of this one was faster...the rhythm the rhymes...but again that might have just been the way i read it....always love to read u...so u better keep posting..lol

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