Old 09-21-2009, 08:47 PM   #1
Questions and Answers Series 1

Every now and then when i read magazine's i'll post a situation and you guys com eup with the advice to give to her/him.

Situation 1 : A single mother's search for Mr. Right.
I feel no man wants me because i have so many children. I'm a single mom with three kids who hasn't been successful in relationships. SHould i give up on finding a husband?
Situation 2: Choosing love or money
My boyfriend of two years is great, but he wants to quit his job. He is usually employed only for about six months at a time while i'm struggling to make ends meet. I want this to work out, but I don't want to sell myself short. What Can I Do?
Now You my fellow d.h.a.z members what would be your answers to these two people.

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KreyoL LaDii is offline
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09-21-2009, 09:16 PM
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sit1:

Dont give up...stop searchin let him come to you.....your main focus should be your kids for now...

Sit 2:

RUNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!
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09-21-2009, 10:24 PM
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Situation 1 : A single mother's search for Mr. Right.
I so agree with Lo on this one...don't give up....just stop looking and make that person find you.....dress nice, nothing too revealing, nothing too safe, just enough to make guys notice and be confident.


Situation 2: Choosing love or money
Tell him up front how u feel and if he cant get with it...get out...obviously he's lazy and not thinking about u and him...just him.
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09-21-2009, 11:08 PM
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situation one.. hang in there... ure bound to find a guy who loves kids


scenario two... please leave.. if he cannot bear the responsibility of holding down a job.. i dont see how you would expect things to get serious with this guy.. cant imagine how he would handle taking care of kids or marriage... it wud seem that his outlook on life is to quit wen it gets hard...
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09-22-2009, 04:06 AM
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1)get a vibrator and look after your kids

2)leave
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09-22-2009, 10:48 AM
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hmm

[1] - Let love find you. Worked for me I was single for 3 years, and when i fianlly said Eff it all, I meet a guy who matched exactly what i wanted, both physically, mentally, ... we still working on emotionally lol. Confidence is key. Don't look like a poor ting, no one wants to be capt'n save a hoe.

[2] - As my grandmother would say, "Yuh cont love pon empty stomach" One would try to make it work, but in the long run you will feel the strain and eventually start chasing other means to making ends meet.
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09-22-2009, 11:39 AM
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Originally Posted by Mz K View Post
Situation 1 : A single mother's search for Mr. Right.
I feel no man wants me because i have so many children. I'm a single mom with three kids who hasn't been successful in relationships. SHould i give up on finding a husband?

Situation 2: Choosing love or money
My boyfriend of two years is great, but he wants to quit his job. He is usually employed only for about six months at a time while i'm struggling to make ends meet. I want this to work out, but I don't want to sell myself short. What Can I Do?
1. stop looking for a husband/daddy for your kids...no one wants to come into a situation where they feel like a trap was set for them....
stop feeling sorry for yourself for having your kids and for being unsuccessful in past relationship..if you feel that no one will want you for having your kids and that you are unworthy then you will attract men who will treat you like you are unworthy re-enforcing your negative feelings about yourself...
confidence is attractive...and i said confidence not arrogance...dont under estimate your strengths...take care of your kids, raise them right, be a good mother, if you dont know how to do that then take the steps to find out how...check in your community for workshops... some churches and/or community colleges offer parenting workshops....get back your self- respect and know your worth as a person and as a woman on the inside and then show it on the outside....in how you dress and how you carry yourself...hold on to your dignity...and that is how you will attract a man of substance who will see the value in your achievements as a single mother of 3...

2. its not about choosing love over money...working with someone and sharing the load is loving them and building respect....carrying the load and enabling a negative behavior is actually hurting them and building resentment...but this woman seems to be in denial still...she said the boyfriend was great...but she obviously doesnt feel that way since she resents him for being him...its not about how many "positive" or "negative" qualities we think a person has...its about the VALUE we give to that positive or negative quality....and obviously having a man that wont hold onto a job for more than 6 months its a big negative for her and she will always resent him for it and wont be able to respect him...and a woman cant be happy in a relationship if she isnt able to respect her man...she will always find ways to make him know she doesnt respect him many times not even knowing that thats what she is doing...im curious to know whats his reason for not holding on to a job for no more than 6 months though...

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